Well Fit Journalist
Where do your doodle ideas come from?
Me
I sit in my kitchen and wait for Jesus to send them to me.
Well Fit Journalist
Yes, but what is the inspiration behind them?
Me
Tragic moments from my past. Do you have a boyfriend?
Well Fit Journalist
Have there been many tragic moments in your past?
Me
Yes. Hundreds. But two years of psychotherapy has fixed me right proper. Would you like to be my girlfriend? I am very romantic.
Well Fit Journalist
Could you share one of your tragic moments?
Me
No. If you were my girlfriend I would write love poems about you every day.
Well Fit Journalist
I’ve been reading your blog, it’s very funny…
Me
[Am smiling]
Well Fit Journalist
…in a tragic needy navel gazing kind of way.
Me
[Have stopped smiling]
Well Fit Journalist
Why on earth do you do it?
Me
Err... because it is a place for me to offload my thoughts. And also ladies sometimes send me naked pictures of themselves. So do you have a boyfriend?
Well Fit Journalist
I do have a boyfriend. Yes. He is very handsome and quite butch.
Me
[Am crying]
[like a baby]
[everyone in the Pie & Mash shop is staring]
[Well Fit Journalist seems a bit cross. She is putting on her coat]
[am still crying]
[like a baby]
[Well Fit Journalist has stormed out of the Pie & Mash shop]
[I am all alone]
[everyone is still staring at me]
[in a Pie & Mash shop]
One day I shall do a doodle about this tragic moment.
