I was devastated when they said my depression had lifted. What shall I do now, I wondered, when opportunity accosts me in the street?
Depression had always been my escape route. ‘I can’t do that’ I would mournfully sigh, reaching for my bucket of Prozac ‘I’m depressed’, and opportunity would bother me no more. But the depression has lifted. The ace up my sleeve has been ruthlessly removed.
I am completely fucked.
You have always two possibilities.
Posted by: KleinesF | May 27, 2006 at 05:40 AM
KleinesF - sink or swim, live or die, I know ... but the depressions gave me a third option: Hide.
The third option has gone ... and it seems I have no choice but to spend the weekend constructing my mother's Ikea bed. Bugger.
Posted by: andre | May 27, 2006 at 05:47 AM
It's okay, when in serious doubt, you can always fall back into depression. You aren't completely fucked because the option to hide is always there, in the face of opportunity.
Posted by: tiny | May 27, 2006 at 09:28 AM
Assembling a piece of Ikea furniture:
- wrestle with package to open.
- it will not open: go find scissors to cut through extremely thick tape
- package opens and contents - including bags and bags of tiny crews - scatter around
- look for instructions
- discover there are no instructions
- look again and discover there are instructions but they are in Swedish
- toss instructions aside and work with the picture of your "inner furniture"
- 3 hours and 12 cups of tea later: you have three disturbingly large screws to spare
- furniture wobbles ominously when taken into use
- take a deep breath and go find a dictionary
Posted by: Ame | May 27, 2006 at 09:50 AM
I disagree. Hiding is not a third option, just a variation on the second.. die.
What use is this life if all we do is hide from it? Go out, be scared, laugh, dance, cry. Live. Simple? No. Achievable. Yes, every single day.
Here endeth the lesson.
(sorry, didn't mean that to be quite so sanctimonious! I've been there though, and know what is now possible for you)
Posted by: Gordon | May 27, 2006 at 09:56 AM
Gordon - you are right. Hide = die.
Posted by: andre | May 27, 2006 at 11:22 AM
I envy you Andre,I longed to give my depression it's head, let it take it's coarse, I'm sure it passes faster that way
but at my deepest, darkest time I had two others dependent on me, one very young, one very old, I had to fight my way through it day after day.
To this day I'm unsure if that lengthened or shortened my recovery
Posted by: Robin | May 27, 2006 at 01:21 PM
Oh, BTW, my daughter is taking me to Ikea tomorrow, can I borrow some Prozac?
Posted by: Robin | May 27, 2006 at 01:24 PM
Go to the park. When I spend time with Nature, I don't feel I have to do anything. Just Be.
Posted by: eric | May 27, 2006 at 04:32 PM
No sleeves, andre, no sleeves...
Posted by: cosmosgirl | May 27, 2006 at 04:58 PM
Hiya! What a lovely post to come back to. My advice: just lie. Too much truth can drop you in the shit.
Posted by: Peter | May 28, 2006 at 05:35 AM
hi Peter ... nice to see you in my box.
Posted by: andre | May 28, 2006 at 05:42 AM
It was the depression.
Posted by: Peter | May 28, 2006 at 06:52 AM
When I was growing up and things were very hard I used to secretly wish to be diagnosed with depression, or anything really. Just so I would have an excuse.
Posted by: melbourne.train.girl | May 28, 2006 at 10:12 AM
When I was growing up and things were very hard I used to secretly wish to be diagnosed with depression, or anything really. Just so I would have an excuse.
Posted by: melbourne.train.girl | May 28, 2006 at 10:16 AM
why hello there andre. your future is painted with smilies.
Posted by: vain | May 28, 2006 at 10:32 AM
depression lifted? it's just another perspective, another facet in the semi-precious stone that is life. what the hell..have a look around...
Posted by: laurel | May 28, 2006 at 04:27 PM
ps. andre? i'm a blog reader of several blogs, but you're my first comment. can't say only comment since I posted the postscript.
Posted by: laurel | May 28, 2006 at 04:28 PM
Confession time: you were my first comment as well.
Posted by: cosmosgirl | May 28, 2006 at 05:30 PM
I can't remember whose blog I first commented on ...
Posted by: andre | May 29, 2006 at 04:24 AM
But are you always busy, busy busy?
Posted by: thecatgirlspeaks | May 29, 2006 at 08:01 AM
hair dresser on fire
Posted by: andre | May 29, 2006 at 08:07 AM
hair dresser on fire. film at 11? arson charges pending?
Posted by: Dawn | May 29, 2006 at 10:02 AM
Recovering from Ikeaitus, the shaking has almost stopped, no Prozac but alcohol helps
after the trauma of the car park my daughter (also a non-sheep like her dad) strolls around the store in the opposite direction to the guiding arrows, no scandaweagian is going to tell US which way to walk around his shop, oh no!
(the urge to jump from a sofa was immense)
I may buy a bed
and a kitchen
when I've recovered
Posted by: Robin | May 29, 2006 at 06:45 PM
hard to imagine depression would really go away or that one would want it to. it's always around like a cosy blanket i bury myself in when things around get too much to handle
Posted by: kranthi | April 06, 2007 at 03:10 PM
Hi to all, nice blog i just want to say hello
here!
Posted by: stefanbh | July 22, 2007 at 08:46 PM