Just leave me alone

I am skinny. Puny. Meek. But I am not weak.

Most people misdiagnose this part of me.

When I say most people - what I mean is - women. And when I say women I don’t mean all women, no, that would be chauvinistic, and wrong - I mean a particular type of woman that is attracted to my skinny, puny, meek ways. I am talking about women with a Borderline Personality Disorder.

Now, I know you’re all sitting there, reading this, thinking Andre’s playing the self-deprecatingly fool again but I’m not – this is not a fable – it’s a fact – even the Blessed One [my therapist] agrees. Ladies with a Borderline Personality Disorder are completely infatuated by me.

It's beginning to piss me off.

Comments

[HAREM WARDEN]

I think I have a similar affliction (on the rare occaisions that I actually get any female interest!). Like the site anyway. x

[Darcy]

hmmmmm, I seem to have this same problem Andre, only, of course, I get all the crazy men coming after me. And they stalk me. Seriously, out of my last 5 relationships, 4 of the guys stalked me for 6 months to over 2 years. And you know what, it pisses me off too. I hope your luck changes.... you deserve to be happy...cause you are ace.

[Southern Bird]

that theory must be crud! I once did one of those online tests and it said out of all the disorders that i was most likely to have that one. Not that i have it as such. Maybe i do, who knows. But.. i'm not infatuated with you dear. Perhaps that means i dont have it then.
hmmmmmm

[Erin]

Hey - I like your site and I think you are funny. And I am definitely not borderline.

[isabel]

darcy, me too!! stalkers.

what is borderline personality disorder anyway? i'm not sure anyone even really knows what it is?

well andre, i like your wit and your art.

you're the only person i have run across on the net, or anywhere else, that manages to talk your suffering, and even be maudlin and whiney, and still it's good reading.

most personal blogs that deal with the writer's depression are so bad, one can't bear to read them.

but i won't stalk you, or beat you, or whatever those borderline women do.

what DO they do, by the way?

[Peter]

zed will be so cross. she adores you.

[Dawn]

People make that mistake with me, too. They mistake kind and gentle for weak. Gives 'em quite a shock when I then rear up on my hind legs and let 'em have it! I don't attract BPD types, though, thank heaven. In fact, I don't attract anybody at all, hardly. I have had sex in the last 38 years, though. But as I'm 48, maybe that's not much better. Pisses me off.

[theinsider]

Um.. I'm not infatuated with you and I don't have a borderline personality disorder.. so does that make what you said correct?

Nooo.. that would be irrational.

:)

[Virg]

Borderline personality disorder: A serious mental illness characterized by pervasive instability in moods, interpersonal relationships, self-image, and behavior. This instability often disrupts family and work life, long-term planning, and the individual's sense of self-identity.

People with BPD often have highly unstable patterns of social relationships. While they can develop intense but stormy attachments, their attitudes towards family, friends, and loved ones may suddenly shift from idealization (great admiration and love) to devaluation (intense anger and dislike). Thus, they may form an immediate attachment and idealize the other person, but when a slight separation or conflict occurs, they switch unexpectedly to the other extreme and angrily accuse the other person of not caring for them at all. Even with family members, individuals with BPD are highly sensitive to rejection, reacting with anger and distress to such mild separations as a vacation, a business trip, or a sudden change in plans. These fears of abandonment seem to be related to difficulties feeling emotionally connected to important persons when they are physically absent, leaving the individual with BPD feeling lost and perhaps worthlessness. Suicide threats and attempts may occur along with anger at perceived abandonment and disappointments.

Thought I'd chuck this is in for interest - I didn't write it !! Just copied it .. there is zillions of stuff written about BPD - just google it if you're intersted. I work with BPD people everyday and as frustrating and infuriating as they can be .. they are equally facinating !! Why do people do what they do !! facinating alright !!!

[little red]

well then bulk up, get to the gym, and have a bit of attitude about you, and you wont attract all the *sickos* that are out there....hell you may even then turn into my type of man the *asshole*

[Vaughan]

I've discovered that mad attracts mad. All the people I know are. Mad, that is. (Sorry, a very crap response, that).

[andre]

virg - you forgot the 'scary as fuck' bit

vaughan - Mad is ace - what makes the world interesting - border line is not as - tis fucking scary

the insider - why aren't you infatuated - I am ace

Erin - thanks

[little red]

unless the *wacko* lives near you...youll be fine :) ...but then if they are an email *wacko*...i guess that would be hard :(

[Edith]

Perhaps they are after you because they think you understand them, the 'real' them. Your experiences with depression not doubt make them think, 'this guy understands'. It's seductive to find someone who has problems as big as yours but almost always ends in tears.

x

[theinsider]

rotfl.. :) You are Ace.. why aren't I infatuated... hmm. I mean, you're adorable and I think you're a peach... but I'm infatuated with another blogger. :P Sorry. Love you thought! :) :)

[Southern Bird]

awww i want an infatuation!

[zed]

andre, i do not suffer from BPD. i just happen to be slightly barking.

i forgot to mention - i'm mad about you too. not many people get away with squeezing my left tit in maastricht WITHOUT getting slapped in the face.

[boxen]

you don't seem that skinny, maybe the tallness offsets it? anyways, you get what you give off. I like you as an honest, curious, talented person - however, you do get depressed, and this is a personality disorder, and since you are very open and focused on this on your blog it stands to reason that those who are attracted to this are also focused on this. not to say this is all you talk about, but it's a blog - it's about the stuff that is in your world; fine. beautiful. revolution. it'll always grab the curious types though.

[boxen]

oh, and you're the biggest flirt and you seem to love the attention, despite or in spite of any shyness.

[andre]

Boxen - I am not talking about the people who read my blog - I am talking about the real people i have dated ... all bar two had BPD

real girls Ive dated have never read my blog - I have never said this stuff out loud - Only people who read my blog know this stuff.

Zoe - you have a lovely breast - i often dream about it.

Boxen - but Im not really flirting am I - I am virtually flirting.

[little red boat anna (not heavyweight)]

I don't know anout borderline personality disorder, but I have had a problem in the past with weak little puppies of men developing infatuations with me. You know, the little yapping kind that you desperately want to punt away into the distance but know that if you do, they#ll just came scampering back, tongue out and panting? And, like, bring you a stick or something? Oh. No. Hang on, that's actual dogs.

What was I talking about?

[andre]

little red boat anna - have you been drinking German beer?

[quarsan]

not all women have BPD.

some just have PD

[Southern Bird]

And more have D?
*snigger*

(sorry!)

[boxen]

oh, well okay then. problem solved. date your obsessed readers on a virtually real / really virtual level & see how many bpd'ers you get out of it.

this will be also be a test of true virtuosity. only then will we know if you are virtually flirting, flirting virtually, really flirting or flirting - really.

[Jimena]

Yes strength in nrbmeus. I have certainly found it to be true for me. Reading your blogs and others comments made me feel stronger and not an isolated case. To know that we all have complete empathy for one another. If you have not experienced a relationship with a BPD partner you cannot possibly fully understand the damage they do and the carnage they leave. In our NONS community Us Project, we do. Looking forward to your next blog.