Breastfeeding

I’ve always considered breastfeeding a marvellous thing. Not only does it bond mother and child, but it also offers up a free dollop of immunity. Marvellous. God bless the perfectly natural, not even slightly erotic, wonders of Mother nature.

I was sitting in my local pub-garden the other day with a friend [sorry, I’ve decide to keep my friends identities secret from now on – I think it’s for the best – I have a moral duty] anyway, there I was, sipping a Stella artois, when she, my anonymous friend, whipped out a booby. I wasn’t quite sure what to do?

Should I mention how perfectly natural, and proper, and un-erotic I thought it all was. Should I pretend I hadn’t noticed? Should I say, in a matter of fact, friendly, reassuring way ‘hey, that’s a lovely breast you have’?

I decided to ignore it – pretend I hadn’t even noticed.

About an hour later, my anonymous friend decided to whip out her other booby.

I decided to ignore that one too, and continued talking to her about God.

Half an hour later, my anonymous friend, lifted her white top and said ‘shit, I’ve forgotten which side I used last time?’

‘The right’ I immediately replied.

Whoops

Comments

[Lesley]

Maybe you can try it for yourself some day like Mr Nice Guy. See his latest post at http://bonnehomme.blogspot.com/.

[Fa]

Even as a woman I find this behaviour strange....I suppose you have to have kids to finally not give a fuck about getting them out in public!

[Dan]

The picture of the women carrying a bag and her shadow being cast on the floor is amazing i would put that in your exibhit (ahh i can spell). Nice job with the boob mistake.

[Joana]

Rest assured that almost no-one knows what to do in that situation. And I'm a woman! And I plan to breastfeed when I have kids (as if there were any other option...)!
I used to feel embarrassed for looking so eagerly (memories from my own breastfeeding?) and I still look on with a smile on my face, but now I'm just not embarrassed anymore. I think the ideal attitude would be to politely ignore it, continuing to talk. Not ignore it and turn your head away so fast it gives you a whiplash!
You did alright, I would say. :)

[nancy]

is it odd that my only response to this post is:
mmmm, stella artois, yum.

[Shannon]

As a mom who breastfed for 23 months, I can remember many a day when I would have loved for someone to tell me which side to start with. Not to worry, anyway; if she is comfortable whipping them out and breastfeeding in front of you, she's not going to worry about you noticing.

Well done!!

[vit]

hehehehe... boooooobs.
I think most of portugal had seen mine by the time I finally put them away.

[little red]

ok so you changed your post...why?

[Gordon]

Ah yes. I find eye contact is a good way to go.

[Anji]

You really are a 'new man' Andre

[zed]

quite some style there. i'd hardly know it's you writing but things are a bit messed up over here.

[Southern Bird]

New look to the blog dear? lovely.
Did you point at the breast and shout "THAT TITTY NUMNUMNUM" too? Because you know that would of just been terrible unseamly.

[Celti]

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

:)

[tJ]

now i wonder who SHE could be

[boxen]

it's all so fabulous. :)

[deeleea]

Not sure How I Got Here but love the blog, looks great and reads like a dream... And the boob post?

Still laughing... Brilliant!

[jobalonie]

we should have met for lunch many years ago when i was breast feeding my twins simultaneously! it was a real teat feat!

i love your writing, you made me laugh out loud!

[agid]

hi my friend I LOVE YOU MORE THAN EVERY THING ... AGID 22

[padded nursing bras]

Your blog is really very interesting, thank you and keep posting.
Martina

[Ameda Ultra]

You know what, I just love your blog, you have always impressed, thanks.